Jay Mariotti and the Bears' draft

I don't consider myself a media watchdog by any means, but Sunday's column from Jay Mariotti on the Bears' draft needs to be called to attention. Here's what he thinks the Bears should have done in the draft (I stopped reading soon after the following passage because I was beginning to develop a painful welt on my forehead):

That's because Angelo, on an afternoon when numerous teams traded up to land their desired targets, passed on a possibility to trade up for Rashard Mendenhall in the first round and draft one of two talented quarterbacks in the second round. When Mendenhall began to tumble from the top half of the opening roll call, Angelo and Smith were still in the auditorium, yapping to the media about Williams when they could have been plotting to pull a 2-for-1 that could have led to a 3-for-2. Oh, to have struck a deal for the local hero Mendenhall, who was waiting impatiently at The House of Blues for his cell phone to ring. That way, the Bears could have had their new lineman and next running back in one swoop, which would have allowed them a choice of quarterbacks Chad Henne or Brian Brohm with the 44th pick.

According to this here NFL draft-pick value chart, the Bears would have needed to trade away their second round pick (44^th overall) and then their two picks in the third round (70^th and 90^th overall) to trade up to get the 21^st or 22^nd pick, just before where the Steelers selected Mendenhall. There's no way trading up to the 21st or 22^nd pick would have worked while holding onto the 44^th pick, so there was no chance of the Bears drafting Brohm or Henne too, unless ... I've got it! Jerry Angelo could have sent along the still-technically-in-his-prime Adam Archuleta, the other Adrian Peterson, who could have excited some confused casual fans for a couple of minutes, or those valuable third-stringers every team needs to fill a 53-man roster instead of that second-round pick!

It would have been just about impossible for the Bears to have ended up with the haul of Chris Williams, Rashard Mendenhall and Brian Brohm or Chad Henne. Well, maybe not impossible. Let's just say that it would not have been able to happen. The NFL draft-pick values are not an exact science, but they are close enough that it's clear the Bears didn't have enough to end up with Mendenhall, Brohm/Henne or a quality offensive tackle, which is the position the Bears most needed to use that first pick on. (You could factor in the Bears trading away a few of next year's picks, but then that gets a little hazy and impractical, I think.)

Other than provoking Mariotti's bit of thoughtless commentary, I liked the Bears' draft. They needed an offensive tackle, so they picked Chris Williams. Cedric Benson badly needs a kick in the ass, so Angelo used the second-round pick on a Matt Forte, who has just as good a chance to be productive as any of the others taken this year. LSU safety Craig Steltz's draft profile on ESPN.com says he “can get beat deep when left on an island,” so he'll fit right in with the safeties the Bears have now. (Or at least it gives him something in common with Archuleta, whose girlfriend is apparently former Playboy Playmate Jennifer Walcott. Listen to what he tells you, Craig.)

I really agreed with the Bears picking defensive tackle Marcus Harrison in the third round. The Bears gave playing time to Jimmy Kennedy late last season, and you can ask Rams fans how that tends to play out. They know all too well. The pick of Vanderbilt receiver Earl Bennett bolsters the NFL's most uninspiring pack of wide receivers just a little bit. And yes, they really are that bad. Let's just say Marty Booker's the top receiver on this team right now, and that welt on my forehead is starting to hurt again. I need some ice ...

(But in parting, I applaud the Bears' solid -- and boring, I guess -- draft.)